A Legal Alien

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11 September 2007

I'm a bit sentimental tonight but I'm not sure if that's being tired, getting a cold or simply remembering.

Who's to blame for the life that tragedies claim?
No matter what you say it won't take away the pain
That I feel inside, I'm tired of all the lies
Don't nobody know why
It's the blind leadin' the blind.
Guess that's the way that the story goes,
Will it ever make sense somebody's gotta know,
There's gotta be more to life than this,
There's got to be more to everything
I thought exists

I'm not an overly patriotic American for a lot of reasons. Mostly, I can't stand the direction our country is going. I loathe the so-called foreign policy we adapt to fit our own agenda. When I was an expat, I had the best of both worlds, the rights of an American with none of the flag waving bullshit. Today though, today. Today feels like a strange day not to be proud, although the label of "Patriot Day" makes my stomach churn. I remember vividly the days that came after 9/11/01. I remember putting up a flag for the first time ever. I remember grieving in my own quiet way for those who'd lost their loved ones and now, my grief is for the world that stopped existing that day. The naivete. The guarded optimism. The world where my students didn't have any idea what a terror level code was, what we were before those planes hit the towers, that world is gone. May my own loathing of the GOP and President Bush never cloud my remembrance of those who died, of those who lost husbands, wives, children, siblings, parents, friends.

And still, I sit here listening to pop music, watching my dog try to lick his own butt. Obviously the world is going straight to hell.

For Paul Barrett

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