mind the gap

26 January 2005

Don't abruptly stop taking medication that requires weaning.

I'm fine, sort of. Ok I'm not fine. I'm not trying to be melodramatic. It's just the nature of being sick. Everything is worth being melodramatic about when my brain is misfiring. I went to the doctor to get back on medicine again. I need it to function like a normal person. I don't think people understand it because I always seem fine. But I come home and bawl because I miss my dogs, because I have no idea what I'm going to do after school is over, because I let my guard down yet again and got burned.

I'm finally grieving. Grieving Mel, grieving my life that hasn't exactly gone according to plan. Maybe it's ridiculous, I don't know.

I'll be ok in a few days, when medicine kicks in and I remember there's plenty to be happy about and I left behind the things I'm grieving to lead the life I always wanted.

Until then, no mascara, lots of chocolate.
mind the gap